The next steps

I was going to write today about the bliss of having finished all one’s paying work (not that the money isn’t appreciated but I’ve the luxury of editing cash being an add-on to other family incomings) and having a bit of free waters upon which to do my own work. I have started (ish) writing original material again, see. But then a new job has hoven into sight and my free time is gone once again. Ah well, pays the bills, is not actively unpleasant, ho hum. Back to the ‘putting off my own work’ we go.

At the moment my free energy, when some of which I get, is mostly being spent on readying New Gods for the big wide world. Having just finished my final read-through, my current missions are to write a blurb and type-set the manuscript, all so I can liaise with the cover designer and get the jacket all properly laid out and beautiful. Which it will be, because the designer’s great and knows what she’s doing. I, for one, don’t.

So: typesetting. I have been wholly ignorant of how to go about laying out a book for publication. It all seems to involve setting up a manuscript with different styles and potentially using software more complicated than Word (I tried using Scrivener for a while – in fact, I reorganized New Gods at an earlier draft-stage – and didn’t really get on with it). This is a strain and was causing considerable stress.

Fortunately, in my peregrinations across the internet, I came across this excellent template which essentially does all the hard work for you. If you’re, like me, looking to self-publish and don’t really know what you’re doing, I heartily recommend at least having a look, if not copying it wholesale.

As for blurbing, again, I am a boy of little brain. I have had goes aplenty – hell, I’ve done it before, for Night Shift and Human Resources. But I’ve never felt like I’ve nailed the brief. How do you make a novel sound gripping and moody and intense and all those good adjectives in only 150 words? It makes writing a synopsis look like a piece of cake.

I shall mull and draft and redraft. And of course you, lovely reader, will be the first to see the results.

Unholy Pitches

Wordpile

For the love of all that’s holy, don’t try and sell a novel with an ensemble cast.

That’s the message I have for you today; another episode in the ‘Oh my lord, what the hell have I done?’ series I’ve been running for what seems like forever. Now there’s nothing wrong with trying to write a novel with an ensemble cast – write what the hell you like – but trying to create a pitch for a novel without a single identifiable star is another thing entirely.

Yes, it’s more Pitch Wars angst from me. By the time you read this I’ll have sent my submission into the electronic ether* and I’ll be chewing on my knuckles, fingernails long-since devoured. See, the thing about Pitch Wars is that you actually have to pitch. Or at least you have to write a query letter.

Now a long, long time ago I was actually brave/stupid enough to try and give advice on querying. I think, by and large, I wasn’t entirely wrong. But I didn’t realise then that American queries are different. And Pitch Wars uses the American system.

Basically, an American pitch is – well, it’s a pitch. Basically it’s like sending a mini-synopsis or book-blurb, the kind you’d see on the back of a novel. These are hard at the best of times but when you have seven major characters, all of whom demand that they’re the star? A blurb that covers all of them would completely cover the back of a book (in very small print) and start creeping across the front as well. And that’s before we get to what actually happens to significant minor creatures, like the girl whose murder sparks a whole sub-plot and emotional wringeration, or the creepy neighbour-witch who gives another character a major fillip…

So basically I have to choose one of my cast and put her centre-stage, ignoring the rest of the crew. It’s the only way I can see to do it. But she’s not the character the novel opens with, and I worry about confusing the reader/judge, and, and, and…

So if all you out there want to save your sanity, don’t work with ensemble casts. Not on your debut, at least. Save it until you’ve got a reputation, when people are slightly more likely to indulge you. It’s the only way to be safe.

 

*Not submitted yet. Today. Tomorrow at the latest. Stupid last-minute editing