After last week’s cri de coeur I return to calmer waters. Progress is slow. Work is frequently interrupted, patterns nascent, yet to fully form. There are images in the maelstrom but they are vague and shifting, unpredictable and ill-shaped.
I am managing to get enough work done to stave off the wolves – to make it possible to write this blog post, for one thing. I’m even managing to do a bit of creative writing – just a few words here and there, you understand.
These are strange times. We can’t measure ourselves against what’s normal. For some of us this is a chance to get a lot of writing down, a lot of art produced. For others it’s a time of shutdown, where nothing is possible. Thanks to a spot of timesharing with my wife I lie somewhere in the middle. What I’m trying to do, to cope, is to take the pressure off myself. Anything I do is a bonus. But I expect nothing.
There are odd spots of normality. I managed to record a podcast with Jane from Dumpy Little Unicorn, which was great fun and lovely and strangely unreal, to be talking of ordinary things whilst the world is collapsing around our ears. I’ll let you know as soon as it’s up, should you wish to hear me rambling about books and writing.
But this just serves to heighten the oddness of these times we find ourselves in. Be kind to one another, I entreat you all. Be kind to yourself most of all. My method, as I said, is to stop measuring progress in words or even in time spent on a project. My success is simply to be sitting at my desk and having my documents open. Keeping a project in the subconscious is a win; any words added – or deleted – is a bonus.
So yes, this is just a little ramble, a way of coping and of sharing a few little thoughts with you. I think this is how the next few weeks will be; no normality save that we make for ourselves; and then one day we’ll turn round and find that this is normal and the real world will seem like nothing but a distant memory.
How are you doing?